Squashing the Most Excellent Grandchildren: So... had the first meeting of the new class - Child and Adolescent Development. On the syllabus it states:

* It is important to compliment your instructor on her most excellent grandchildren

Can I tell you that am so not feeling a connection with this woman? Maybe it's because she's Mormon -- her youngest son gets back from his Mission on December 21st -- and she has 5 sons older than him and also a daughter. (Though I would like to say that to her credit she doesn't look old enough to have that many kids of that age.) Maybe I just resent the fact that she's filling my head with useless junk about her family while expressing little interest in what the class wants.

She's broken up our learning team, from 6 people to 3 and 3. BUT, she added in 2 people from another group to our other half for the final project, AND added another guy to our half so may or may not show up. Fabulous. I am unimpressed.

We're working in groups more than ever - which I dislike extremely - but which I understand to be the driving force of the U of P. And the first paper which I spent a whole morning on for last week's class, doesn't even receive a grade -- but if you didn't do it, you lose points. Oh yeah, just shpiffy.

So far I am not feeling any connection with this woman. However -- the class only meets 6 times and I probably will gain something from it, even if I can't stand the teacher or her methods.

Anyway - I have to get back to the new apartment for lunch before work. I will attempt to find an attitude adjustment before coming back here. Promise. :-)

Still alive: This whole packing thing is taking a lot out of me. I still have my computer hooked up at the old place, but that's about all that's here. It's going well, though I suspect getting everything arranged to a point where both of us can live with it might take some struggle.

Reminds me of my mother's story of remodeling the family home when I was about 10 years old. We put two bedrooms -- mine and my brother's -- into what had been the attic. My mother had one idea for how to do the closets, my father had another. My father won that argument and my mother walked around crying for 2 days. The workmen were so upset they could barely look at her while they worked. Granted, Mom was also 9 months pregnant with Kerri at the time...

Fortunately, my problems with Jay seem to be limited to my offering too many suggestions when he asks for my help with something, and a disagreement over where to put the couch. We'll get over it.

I finished my first class in my MAED program. Went fairly well. I expect to get a solid A in the class. We have this week off from the demands of our learning team meeting, but the next class - Child and Adolescent Development - starts Thursday. I can't wait to be totally moved in to the new place... this back and forth while working 50 hours a week and going to school is running me into the ground.

And hopefully, once I get settled, I'll be able to keep up with this thing a bit better.

One can only hope, eh?

PowerPoint: Would that refer to the driving headache I feel pulsing behind my eyes? I volunteered to coordinate our first group presentation for class... been working on it for about 3 hours. It's starting to look good, but I need the rest of the group's info so I can put all the slides together.

On a positive note, we got up early today and managed to take four big boxes of stuff up to the new apartment, along with my fan, mountain bike, and x-country skiis. My little smoke-surrounded box is beginning to look empty. Yay! Not to mention the yummilicious Indian food we gorged on last night and the breakfast I treated us to at Sage's Cafe this morning. So... not really a bad weekend at all. If only I could kick this headache and get the muscles in my neck to unclench. But I won't be greedy. Today.

How old?!?! I just realized that my wee baby sister is about to turn 16. 16!!! Old enough to drive. I somehow still think of her as the cute little 7 year old who helped drop me off at college saying, "It's okay, go talk to someone. You can do it." Obviously, she's not the shy one in the family. She was the one I sent to borrow an egg or a cup of sugar from the neighbors if we'd run out while baking cookies. I remember playing with /torturing her and Karlyn when they were little. (Reference to the infamous electrical tape incident below.)

What makes me sad, though, is that I've spent more years away from her than with her. Until the trip we girls made this summer, I didn't really know who she had become at all. We don't have as much in common as Karlyn and I do perhaps. Kerri's sweeter and more sensitive -- less confident, maybe -- but undoubtedly nicer than her older sisters. She's got different attitudes about what's important, and I'd really like to know what they are. So I guess that's what I want to do this coming year: get to know my munchkin better. With a little luck, I hope to get her to come visit me. Not that I have a ton of free time or anything. But for her, I would make time.

I guess I'm just feeling a little homesick for my sisters.

And now back to the regularly scheduled programming: packing and boxing and cleaning - yee haw. Ennh.

I have a home Yes, ladies and gentlemen, instead of living in the apartment complex from hell, I now have a nice 1/2 house apartment. Nicer neighborhood, nicer neighbors, yard and garage... I'm pretty darn psyched.

And now that I have ABsolutely no money, I'm going to the mall to buy new shoes because I wore through the sole of my old ones completely today. And they were only 10 months old. Worn 5 of 7 days a week for the last 10 months at a job that keeps me on my feet 7 hours out of 9, but hey... I think they've earned a funeral.

We have an apartment!! Hee hee!

Just stay calm So, we got a look inside the apartment today. It's partially underground so the lighting isn't the best but it wouldn't cost as much to heat or cool and considering our environment, that's a big plus. The landlady's awesome -- outdoorsy, liberal, practical... she liked us, too, because she said that if we wanted it, we could have it. Yeah.

And my classroom observation, which I had been dreading, went very well. The teacher who scared me last week turned out to be a very nice lady who just happened to be coming down with a nasty cold last time I saw her. Glad I made the second attempt. I'll be going back on Tuesday to interview her for the second part of the assignment.

So now I have to run around and fix my car insurance issues and pay my cell phone bill - all $17. Wish the insurance was as cheap. Argh.

Still experimenting: And no, you pervs, I am not referring to my earlier post. For some reason the stats program I had on the site was making it very slow to load... which annoys the heck out of me, so I changed it over to a different one. We'll see how I like it - may have to make another change.

Speaking of change... I should change out of my nice warm wool sweater and into my fuzzy pyjamas. Sigh. But it's so COLD.

Rather disturbing, actually So, surfing though weblogs today, I found this link, which I foolishly followed... Googlism. Once there, I entered my first and last name and came up with this:

kate **** is reisboekenschrijfster

kate **** is like a magician as she makes your c*ck disappear into my a**

So is anyone else disturbed by that, or is it just me? Granted, I don't know what the first means, but the second makes me sound like a illusionist madame in a gay brothel. My next career, I suppose.

The search is on! Did our first night of apartment hunting this evening. Jay made all the calls - because I suck at calling people (I get nervous and forget to ask important questions) - and we drove around looking at potential sites, had appointments to look at two of them, and got a call back about a place we liked the look of.

So Friday we'll know what it looks like on the inside. It's a 2 bedroom apartment on the first floor of a house in a good neighborhood for only $550/month if we (if Jay) decides he wants to mow/rake/shovel snow. Which he will because he's like that. Not cheap, I mean, but liking yardwork. I dunno - seems odd to me, too.

Anyway, what with school having started and until I find a place to live these next two weeks might be sparse on updates. I'll do my best though. More for my sake than anyone who might be reading, of course.

Bedtime for me. I can't believe I'm going to bed on time. I am so becoming a responsible adult. Help.

They want me! I have been nominated to carve our departmental pumpkin for the contest! Ohhh, Oooh, oooooooh. Yeah anyway. I have to admit, there aren't many things as satisfying as stabbing a big ol' knife into the top of a pumpkin and scooping out the guts. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the artistry of creating the face or design, too. Just the initial chop and gut brings an intense feeling of rightness to my world.

Sometimes I think I'm creepy, too. Heh heh.

More family pastimes: In response to one of the queries in my comments... Cousin Heather can still hold her alcohol, but she's moved on to more butch beverages: screwdrivers and fuzzy navels. As I said, she's more interesting now. Still just ever so slightly...off. But definitely more interesting.

After a rather annoying encounter with MB and his posse (the men only tonight) who were guzzling out of state beer like there's no tomorrow, I decided that I would be better off hanging out here with my computer instead of driving them all over town. But annoying encounters call for countermeasures, and countermeasures mean Chocolate. So the cookies are a-baking as I write.

However, chocolate reminds me of a little adventure I had this summer with my mother and sisters. See, Father Dearest, no doubt as a thank you to my mother for not booting him out on the street about ten years ago when he was having... issues, chose to finance a three week vacation for us women to France and Switzerland. Yeah, tough life, I know.

We took the night train from Paris to Zurich (a miserable experience in the oldest couchettes in existence) and were wandering around town looking for breakfast and entertainment before catching the train to Bern and Adelboden. The Sprugli gods of chocolate have an outpost in Zurich which we hunted down as quickly as possible. Circling the goods, we at last arrived at the counter containing the croissants, brioches, and other yummies.

Now, all four of us speak French to varying degrees, but none of us know more than a word of German, much less Swiss German which is a bizarre mishmash of German with French words thrown in to add confusion. I say that only to explain what happened next.

We nominate my mother group spokeswoman. She smiles at the sales lady, holds up two fingers and points them at the goodies in the display. "Mmmmm..." she says. "Mmmm... DER?"

Karlyn and I slap hands to foreheads to hide our faces and even Kerri rolls her eyes as the saleswoman says in a crisp accentless English, "Oh, goodmorning. You'd like two of those? Anything else?"

I take over at that point, order up two of everything (there were only 3 choices - I'm not that much of a pig, thankyouverymuch), and hustle us out of the store where we all crumple up laughing. In my family, when something strikes us as funny, we laugh till we cry and watching each other turn red and teary only makes us laugh harder. If someone ever really does die laughing, it will be one of my relatives.

God bless my momma. For the rest of the trip -- and most likely the rest of our lives -- all we have to say is, "Oh, mmmmmm...DER?" And we'll be right back there, falling over laughing at my mom's goof.

More imp-family moments to come...

Hear me roar: I admit, I think the online quizzes are funny. Don't know who makes them up, but, you go! Heh heh. My results: (funny only because I am wickedly allergic to cats of all kinds)



Take the Purrsonality Quiz!

Meeeeoooowww.

I knew I was smarter than my computer! Finally figured out what was wrong with my photogallery link on the page. And it only took me...

Three and a half hours.

Okay, so maybe I'm not a lot smarter than the computer... but I'm a lot more stubborn.

Stressed? Me? I just had a mini-nervous breakdown with the tech support people from school. See, they told me last time I called that the reason I couldn't read any of the downloads was that I didn't have Word on my computer. (Yeah, I know, who doesn't have Word...?") Hence the huge outlay of money as mentioned below. So I spend three hours today getting the increased memory and then installing the new OS and Office package.

Still couldn't download.

So I call back the tech guys. Turns out that Exploder for Mac doesn't work with their website. I download Netscape - BINGO - downloads perfectly. I still like the old Exploder just for familiarity's sake, but now I know: Netscape for downloads. How simple. Just shoot me.

Going to treat the ulcer and wipe the mascara tear streaks off now. Sigh.

Ouch: Just found out that in order to use a lot of the software and downloads for my school stuff, I need masssive upgrades on my computer. I've known that I needed to do this for a while, granted. I just wasn't expecting to have to do it all at once. When I add it all up - Operating System upgrade, Office upgrade, RAM upgrade... comes to roughly $750. Joy.

Excuse me while I go whimper in the corner.

Why we love our mother: And why she would beat me if she read this page. Heh heh. The following clip is from the aforementioned sister email. She forwarded my mother's message and her response to it. I would just like to add, as a point of interest, that the word "sex" has never been exchanged in any conversation between my mother and myself. By some unspoken, mutual decision, we've decided that she waited far too long to have any imput into that aspect of my life. (Also as a side note: My father continues to refer to my boyfriend as "Your friend, that boy." *grin* That boy and I will be moving in together next month.. wonder if he'll then merit a name?)

My mother writes first:
The floors are currently being sanded... the house is interesting... the front lawn is interesting and will be for an hour or two until I finish finding places for chairs...! Steelers won last night... so both men came home relatively happy.
(editors note: notice how simple she starts out. Misdirection is the key to parent-child communication)
I know you are living your own life... and/but I do not want you to live in fear of pregnancy or STD's... Do not take anything for granted with anyone that you meet. ... I do not feel happy about casual sex for fun's sake... it just doesn't belong in a short-term relationship. I certainly wasn't thrilled about **** and **** but at least it has had a natural course of time.
Love, MOM

Karlyn responds:
Oh Susan, Love the progression of your email. Floors...Rob...Steelers...

Casual Sex.

My roommate wants to add that I've only had sex with ten guys since I've been here and they all looked clean. But I can't remember their names anymore.

If you're referring to the new relationship with (mystery boy), you can also chill out. He's a smarter combination of (former cute but stupid boyfriend) and (former musical, moody, eagle scout boyfriend) with a stronger belief in God. He's a virgin, so you can rest assured that we will not be discussing SEX for a very very long time. That is, except for Thursdays when we go to our swingers club.

Do you feel calmer? Goodness, mother. Do I scream "whore" or did Rob (our brother)get the same chat? :o)

Try to sleep at night...

I love Karlyn for sharing these with me. I can just see my Mom looking very serious/silly as she writes the message. (She does this tongue sticking out the corner of her mouth thing when she's embarrassed but trying to be sincere.) And Karlyn's eyes rolling as she reads it out loud to her roomie.

Ah family.

I have two younger sisters (8 and 10 years younger than my own youthful self). Kerri and Karlyn. I recently received an email from my sister Karlyn who has just started her freshman year at some institution (of higher learning, not mental) in Virginia. This email, which will be posted in an edited version soon, reminded me of this tidbit that I copied from one of our Instant Messenger exchanges about 2 years ago. I think this can stand on its own. We really are an odd family.

ivykate98: What happened to Kerri?
ivykate98: You kill her?
Karwyn3: she was too drunk to sit up
ivykate98: Ah, I figured as much.
ivykate98: She did sound a little disjointed.
Karwyn3: no, i'm nice to my baby sister, i couldn't kill her
ivykate98: I was nice to you both, but i seem to recall an incident with electrical tape nonetheless...
Karwyn3: yes yes
Karwyn3: well, oddly enough we enjoyed that
ivykate98: i knew it.
ivykate98: you weirdos

Family: As much as my family makes me absolutely crazy -- I don't live 2000 miles away from them for no reason -- I love them to death. I mean, they're the source of most of my best stories. You know, the ones that leave your listeners slack-jawed with fear or laughter. Yeah, those.

My dad, workaholic (and some other -aholic that will not be named) and "advisory scientist"... What the heck does advisory scientist mean, you ask? Good question, but that's what I put on my college aps way back when. In any case... The man had a heart attack or two about two years ago and has since been on anti-stress drugs and whatnot. Well, he failed his stress test (I could have predicted that - duh) and had to have a cardiac catheter exploration expansion something or other. Goes in on Thursday - doctors open up the femoral artery, send in the camera crew, decide that the blockage isn't bad enough to warrent futher measures, stitch my dad back up and send him home with orders to rest.

The nurse calls on Friday to check on the old man. My mom, unsuspecting, answers the phone. "Oh, he's a work," she says. BUSTED. So they called my dad at work to remind him that he's not supposed to get off the couch. He promises to go right home. Eight hours later...

To give him credit, work probably was considerably less stressful than being at home would have been. My Uncle Bill - his brother - was in for the weekend. Uncle Bill's a wicked, wickedly funny guy -- even more so since the stroke, I think. For a while, the only words he could say were of the four letter variety. Did I mention that he also has no teeth? Hasn't had any for as long as I can remember. From what I understand, he got them all yanked in his thirties because he'd never been to a dentist and they were all rotten.

My mom takes him in at least one weekend a month to give my Aunt Maryann a break. When I was home for Christmas last year, seeing the two of them together was like watching a special-ed comedy routine. Aunt Mary asking if we want to see the scars from her breast reduction surgery (NO - Please no!) one minute, and smacking my Uncle's good hand away from the cookie tray the next. He loves his cookies. Or at least I think that's what he meant by, "Bitch, I eat. You f**kin'... Woman." As I said, the stroke wiped out some of his higher speech functions. Ahem. We also got a visit from my cousin Heather -- formerly a boy crazy ditz always tipsy on wine coolers, now a lesbian who can actually hold a conversation and a job. I like her better as a lesbian, to tell the truth. Oh, and can't forget Chris, her younger brother, who showed up with his 15 year old girlfriend. Did I mention that Chris is 23? Statutory rape anyone? Gak. He's a wee bit too sleazy for my tastes.

Just been thinking about what I'll be missing this year by not going back for the holidays. Sigh. I suppose i'll live.

Thoughts on coolness:First, speaking of cool, I finally upgraded my browser... after two and a half years. Amazing how much faster everything works now. Wish I had thought to check it out earlier. Silly me.

I haven't been posting much, mostly just fooling around with my template: adding links, shuffling tables, changing colors -- that sort of thing. I've also been browsing other people's blogs. I have to say that the negatively toned ones way outnumber the positive. Are we overwhelmed with pessimists? Are people really that unhappy, or has happiness just become "uncool"? Granted, some people have legitimate reasons for feeling down... I thank (insert deity of choice) everyday for my continuing good health. I think that must be one of those things you don't fully appreciate until you lose it.

But a good number of the blogs I read are normal people facing normal issues who seem to need to pan everyone and everything around them. I didn't stay to read much of those blogs -- couldn't face the emotional drain. I hear enough bitching and moaning from the people I work with... more than enough. Some blogs are pointing out issues and inconsistancies in the government or the media -- highlighting their absurdity. This is different. I view those as more a call to wake up and pay attention -- social commentary with a dash of satire. If you've gone bloghopping though, you must know what I'm talking about: the blogs written by people with so little self-confidence that they attack anyone who might be reading with insults like "Don't you have anything better to do, you pathetic blog-reader. You must be a real loser to read my blog". Well, duh. But I mean, c'mon. I heard better insults on the kindergarten playground.

Why this attitude? The blogs I most enjoy are those whose authors purposely remain positive despite the crap floating in their pool. (so to speak.) They can look at the negative elements in their life and find the sense of humor about it all. Because honestly, things that suck in the moment can make pretty funny stories after the suckiness wears off. The real trick is to see the humor while the fit is hitting the shan. That's what I'm trying for in my own life. I don't always get there. I catch myself sliding toward the negative every once in a while. But I think that making the choice to be happy in life is a pretty cool thing. (And I've always wanted to be cool - heh heh)

Early is bad: I got home at 12:45am last night, got back up at 4:25am to drive MB to the airport. Got back to my bed at 5:10am. Unfortunately, it takes way too long for me to fall back to sleep so I was laying in bed for about an hour. Just wrong, just wrong, I tell you.

However, I talked to the parental units and we've agreed on a loan schedule for my masters degree stuff, so that's one less thing I have to worry about. Yay!

Now if only I could settle things at work, I'd be ecstatic. Right. In the meantime, I'm job hunting. Notice a lack of faith in my employment situation here? My problem is that while I do enjoy what I'm doing most days, there are days of sheer hell and unnecessary anguish. I don't trust the other department heads anymore. I certainly don't trust the company to pay me what I'm worth. And with the whole bonus or no bonus guessing game, I'm just tired to playing along with these people. I'm worth more and I intend to get it. Of course, that's a lot of what my going back to school is about: finding a career I love instead of a job I can live with.

Somehow just thinking about this all makes me want to crawl back in bed for a nap.