Sunday, April 10, 2005

Last Ski Day

Went up Mill Creek Canyon today with Jay for what will probably be my last ski of the season. Considering that it's the second week of April, the conditions were quite good. They've stopped grooming the road, but there's been about two feet of new snow in the last week or so and at least everything was covered. The uneven surfaces gave me massive foot and calf cramps though. Took about a mile and a half to relax into it.

But who care about that when there is so much else to worry about....

I'm afraid I haven't been writing lately because I'm totally preoccupied with the whole moving, marrying, finding new job thingy. The interview with the Residential life guy went really well. I'm trying to decide if the disparity in the three people I've spoken to thus far is connected to the fact that I get along much better with men than women. As a general rule. Certainly not a hard and fast one. My best friends are mostly women... Um, that looks wrong. Should probably read "most of my best friends are women." Anyway. Gah. Anyway. I bore myself. Feeling most unclever. I'm trying to figure out whether I should cash in some frequent flyer miles (if possible) to fly back to VT and check the place out for myself. Then I could see the town, see the school, meet with the staff/faculty, and have a better idea of what I have agreed to do.

I think what's really holding me back is one of the guiding principles of my life: don't ask the damn question if you can't handle the real answer. Hence my procrastination. Do I really want to know? Do I want to know that this would be awful and that I could never fit into the school to save my life? (And I'm not speaking from a point of inferiority... sometimes places and people are just not a match for one reason or another.) Do I want to find out that they don't think I'll fit in and that there really are no other teaching jobs available in the area?

Granted, I realize that I need the answers to these questions. And soon. So on Monday I will be calling the airline to see what I can do about getting there. I will have to miss a day of school, or rather, an hour of school on a Friday. I don't know how that will be worked out because as a part time employee I can't get a sub. And who would want to sub for an hour, anyway? Not worth the gas money. And I would need to take about four days off from Sylvan as well. Not a big deal. All together lost wages probably don't come to $150. But since I only make about $1000 a month, this is still something to consider. And Jay has offered to pay for a rental car... and I can stay with friends a few nights and I imagine the school could find me a place to sleep for a night or two while I checked out the area. So I have very few excuses left.

But then again, I've been working on getting the whole, screwed up nose fixed for the last year and I'm stil not any closer to that, despite a lack of remaining excuses... except for the one that letting someone cut my face open and rearrange its parts gives me the willies.

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