Three Steps Past Exhaustion

That's where I'm living this week. And most of the other folks around here are in the same boat.

Came to work today only to finally be able to meet with my boss - she's cancelled 4 meetings in the last 2 weeks and I really need some answers that only she can give.

While I was on my way over to her office, her admin called to cancel.

I don't remember the last time I cried at work. You know, before today, that is.

Bawk bawk

Sometimes I forget that seemingly normal people often have deep wells of The Crazy hiding inside. And I've been trying to limit my consumption of The Crazy, so...

I waited until said coworker was occupied and spoke directly to the student organizer.

"Hey, I was just browsing the website last night and, gosh, I think the rules must have changed since X last checked them, because..."

Wimpy, but effective. And didn't have to absorb any Crazy. Yet.

Pants on Fire

Or maybe not...

I think I just caught a coworker in a blatent lie that affects another former coworker.

But maybe she just has poor reading comprehension?

What to do, what to do?

Would feel better if I didn't suspect confrontation will end badly for me.

Don't want her to think I was checking up on her, even though I totally was.

Maybe I will wait a day and mention the "updated" rules to the organizer directly.

Hmm.

Busy being appalled

Trying to formulate a reasonable response. Just not sure there is one...

Seen on a student's facebook page: "I'd never hit a woman, but I'd smack a bitch."

Seen in my alma mater's student paper: "Feminists need to choose: chivalry or equality."

Blindsided

This all just went down last night, and I got about 4 hours of sleep (instead of my usual 8.5) and I know that unless I get this out of my head a bit, it's going to keep me up for many more nights.

We've been living in our current apartment for two years. We don't have a written lease. Partly because our landlady told us she's never had written leases, and also because we had a very good experience with our previous landlady without a written lease and it didn't occur to us that this time might be different. (Not smart on our part, clearly.)

When we moved in we agreed to stay through May. In May '06 we agreed to stay through August. In August '06, we agreed to stay "through the winter", and that after that we said we would be looking to buy a house. She asked us in June if we would be able to move out by August. As we hadn't seen any houses we liked then, we said that we weren't able to guarantee that, but that we were looking for houses. So in June, she told a potential renter that the place wouldn't be available for sure in August. She never seemed terribly upset about this and just asked that we keep her informed on the status of our house hunting.

We've been keeping her updated. There just hasn't been much definite to share.

Last week we found a house we like and today we'll be putting in an offer. If the offer is accepted, then our real estate agent said to expect 4-6 weeks for the closing process. We wanted to wait to see if the offer was accepted before giving our LL a definite date. For some reason, we were thinking that 30-45 days notice would be appropriate. (Maybe because it always has been in the past...)

Last night LL showed up all pissed off and ranting about how could we forget it was the beginning of the month? We had forgotten to give her the August rent check, which admittedly was our error. She lives in another house on the property so we usually just hand it to her when we see her. She's been down at her son's house taking care of the grandkids this week, and we've been running around house hunting, job interviewing, and farewell partying for friends who are moving away. But we've been a couple days late before and she hasn't cared, and we've given her rent up to a week early before when she needed it before a vacation. So I thought this was not such a huge deal.

She apparently took it as an insult and thought we had decided that August was going to be our last month and that we had just chosen not to inform her. We apologized repeatedly, but she wasn't hearing any of it, she just kept accusing us of taking advantage of her. She asked us if we could be out by September 1st because she has someone else who is interested in renting, and we said that we didn't think so. We said that October would be acceptable, and she countered with "I can't do November!" Um. Okay.

Insert much more yelling that we were being unfair and deceptive and just wanted to do things on our own schedule without thought for anyone else. Especially since EVERYONE KNOWS that she rents August to August only... Everyone except us, apparently. So we're sitting on the couch kind of just sputtering because we're completely unprepared for this, and she just says fine, she'll talk to us later, and storms out.

Ten minutes later she returns to let us know that she just talked to her lawyer and is "serving us papers" to be out by the 9th of next month. She says this is more than fair, fairer to us that we have been to her, and that she's giving us more notice than we gave her, and that she should have known better because she only has problems like this with people who have too much education. (!!! She teaches, same as we do...) We asked for clarification on that last month's rent and the security deposit, and she answered, adding, "Because I'M not dishonest." Basically implying that we are, of course.

I'm more upset about that than about having 30 days to figure out our living arrangements.

Pretty much I think it comes down to all of us hearing the same words and interpreting them differently. It's an issue of communication more than anything, and I have definitely learned my lesson about getting these agreements in writing.

So right now, best case scenario is that our offer is accepted, inspection goes well, bank agrees to finance (we are pre-approved, but they have to decide the house is worth the purchase price), and we're in the new house by October. Worse case, inspection goes bad, we have to find another apartment for a year. Either way, I think we're going to end up with our stuff in boxes, sleeping in a friend's spare room for a couple weeks.

I'm not sure whether I want to cry or scream.

Broken

Recently I've been listening to This American Life while knitting.

This episode: Two Steps Back captures perfectly the reasons I haven't fought too hard to get back into public school teaching. The school and the teachers described and interviewed in the program just about reduced me to tears, because it so closely resembles my experiences with the public school system in this country.

I firmly believe the system is broken. Some individual schools have been spared, but the federal mandates currently in place would change that.

No sane educator would take an honors student and place them in a remedial course. Why then are the educational reform programs doing just that with high-achieving schools and teachers? Yes, some students, and some teachers, need a structured program to help them rise to the expected heights. Knocking people off the top of that peak and making them climb back up at the same pace as the slower ones is pure lunacy.

And this is why I would have to think long and hard about sending a child to public school - not because of the teachers or the curriculum (though I have questions about them, too) - but because of the politics and bureaucracy that have far too much control over the whole system.

Cursing, much cursing

This is so not good.

I spent two and a half hours on the phone with the passport agency (most of that time on hold or cycling through the voicemail options, of course). Despite the fact that I mailed my renewal application at the end of February, it was not logged in until the end of March. It is currently being processed in New Hampshire. The guy I talked to sent an emergency email to the center and said that would most likely get my passport to me before we leave (IN EIGHT DAYS!!!!! yes, I need all those exclamation points because they're standing in for the cussing, okay?).

MOST LIKELY.

So I tried to make an appointment at the regional passport center in Boston. First available appointment? May 18th. We're supposed to leave May 15th. Not helping.

Either my passport shows up this week, or this trip might not be happening after all.

Just one thing missing

Woo hoo! Finally heard back from my London contacts and we are good.to.go! So we've got two nights in London, three in Salisbury (near Stonehenge, for you non-anglophiles), three in Derby, three in Keswick, one in York, and the last night back in London again. I also have our rental car reserved - can't wait to watch Jay drive stick backwards. Heh.

Just one thing needed though. My passport.

I sent in the renewal forms the last week of February. The forms said standard processing time is 6-8 weeks. Other people I've talked to have said that they received theirs in 7-8 weeks. Eight weeks would be today at the latest. And the passport could conceivably be in our rinky dinky post office right this very minute. However - and there's always a "however" - when I signed on to their website to check the status of my application, they are now claiming 10 weeks to be the norm. TEN. We leave in a little over 2 weeks. If it takes the full ten weeks, I won't get it until practically the day we leave. So if it doesn't show by Monday, I need to call and beg.

*imagine profanity of choice here*

I knew I should have forked over the extra $70-80 for expedited service.

gah

Jay got me sick, the meanie. Sinus something. I can hear the snot forming in my sinuses and my face feels like it's going to splinter off from my skull.

Guess what I'm supposed to be doing this weekend? Yes. I'm supposed to be grading research essays. Guess what I won't be doing this weekend. That's right: grading.

Which means that next week is going to suck as I try to get everything done during the week, but so it goes.

I find this appalling

News story about women as second class citizens

Actually, it's an article about the Supreme Court ruling on partial birth abortions which does not have an amendment allowing for abortion to preserve the health of the mother. Women as incubators.

This kind of legislation seems to be pushed through by holier-than-thou patriarchal nimrods who believe that pregnant women and their fetuses need to be protected from bizarre non-maternal instincts. Because, truly, there can never be a legitimate reason to kill babies, can there?

Do they really believe that women who have been carrying a child for six months or more are going to take the decision to terminate that life so lightly? I can't imagine the pain that has to go into that choice.

(Sorry if this seems stilted... what I really want to be writing involves a lot of profanity, and that would probably just detract from the message.)

Why do women lose rights to make decisions about their lives when they become pregnant? Why do other people think that they have the right to decide ANYTHING in a stranger's life?

Would these same people welcome a stranger who told them that they were not allowed to go to church anymore because some religions caused people to be violent in the name of their god? (Of course not, because those other religions are false, and theirs is true and good.)

Or is this all part of the War on Terror? Thems hates us for our freedomses... so we'll take away those freedoms (especially from the womenfolk) to solve the problem.

Brilliant. Just brilliant.

Yes, I know it's just a comic strip

I read For Better or For Worse most days. Recently, at Christmas, one character rushed back into the house to save his just finished manuscript. So, obviously, the earliest he could have sent it out would have been a few days after Christmas.

Last week he gets a full book contract in the mail. RIGHT. He sends a manuscript, unsolicited, to a publisher, over the holidays... and they get back to him with a full contract in a matter of weeks? On what planet? Things can't work that differently in Canada. I won't get into the point that the book is supposed to be coming out in the fall...

Yes, I know it's a comic strip. Yes, I know that the creator is trying to tie up all storylines by the fall. Yes, I know that people should not be relying on comics for accurate representation or information.

But it still bugs me.

Earmarked

You know when you have money coming, extra money that you weren't really planning on having? Well, why is it that the money seems to get spent before it ever comes into your hand? Sometimes, several times over.

Jay calculates that we'll be getting about $1500 back in taxes this year... hopefully enough to supplement the traveling money my dad already gave us for the England trip in May.

Because of the additional class, I have two credits more than past terms, meaning I'll make about an extra $1600... which I have just spent on a new computer. Granted, I really needed the new computer, because it would have cost me about as much to complete all the upgrades to my current iBook, yet left me with a way too small screen... So. Educational discount plus 3 months same as cash... new iMac notebook is on its sweet journey to me. Mwah ha ha ha ha.

But really. There is no such thing as "extra" money. Not on this side of the middle class.

Bah

Apparently my aging computer (a 1999 iBook with a 2002 software upgrade) isn't compatible with the changes to Blogger, so I'm only able to post from work for now.

Enjoyed a visit from my younger sister (the one in NYC) this weekend and now I'm scrambling to get ready for classes starting Wednesday. Cobbling together a syllabus in two days for a course I've never taught - and which is taught very differently by all the instructors who do teach it - is proving to be quite interesting.

With interesting being a euphemism for other, more colorful words, of course.

Things that are wrong with me

No, I'm not asking for suggestions, thanks.

I already have a few specifics in mind.

One, my hand! Owie! All the knitting has left my right hand and arm sore. Either an inflamed muscle or tendon or something, I'm thinking. The pain goes right from the base of my ring and pinky fingers to the underside of my elbow. Massage only makes it worse, but frozen cranberries (we're out of peas) feel really really good. In any case, I'm forcing myself to take a knitting hiatus until the pain stops. (Or mostly stops... whatever.)

Second, Farscape. People whose opinions I respect say this is a great show. We've just finished the 4th episode and are still waiting for the greatness to appear. Does the beginning just suck? Does it get better? Should I keep watching, or is this all there is?

Here's what underwhelms me:

It's a neat concept and the visual delivery is excellent.

But the writing! Ack! I mean, I've had beatings that were more subtle. If I want to be smacked around by moralizing lessons delivered with the finesse of a falling piano, I would go to church. Jay and I were both sitting there, rolling our eyes, yelling "We GET IT ALREADY" at the TV. Not a good sign. I don't know whether it's the writing, or the editing that's so poor, but we agreed that the episodes could be trimmed by about 20% without losing any meaning.

And LORD, I can tell the creators were muppeteers, because anything involving the muppet characters is extremely well done. Anything involving live actors clunks. Not that there aren't good lines, but they get lost in the dragging pace of delivery. It's as if they decided, if expressing an idea once is good, then expressing it four times would be even better.

So.

Any fans out there have opinions on whether the series resolves these problems as it progresses, or should we give up now and move on?

Comment experiment

Trying to figure out the switch from Haloscan to the Blogger comment system...

Distortion

Last night I was in the college's fitness center - a rather small series of basement rooms, but at least they're out of the rain - when I had the privilege of overhearing a most appalling conversation.

One guy and two girls were hanging on the treadmill next to mine, chatting about the sort of random stuff college students talk about, when the subject turned to bodies. Not surprising, I suppose, considering that most of the people in the gym were there to work on their physiques.

First they started to trash one woman they know because of her powerful build - "she's super strong, but she looks like a dude."

Then one of the girls started bitching about the fact that this other young woman doesn't see anything wrong with being naked in front of other people. "Like, gross."

This, of course, segued into her ranting about how no one would ever see her naked, not even her boyfriend. "I'm a lights out girl. I mean, just LOOK at these thighs. I think not." Girl in question was probably 5 foot 3, 5 foot 4 maybe, and I'd guess her weight at about 125-130 lbs. In other words, not a large person by any stretch of the imagination. Actually, I don't think of myself as a particularly large person and I have a good 20-30 pounds on her.

Now, I've been seen naked in all different lighting conditions, and not once has a guy ever said, "WHOA - your thighs look huge!" In fact, the response is usually more along the lines of "You look so hot. C'mere. Now." But enough about my sex life...

By the guy's awkward pause, cough, and shuffling of feet when the girl made her "I'm so fat and ugly" comment, I'm pretty sure he was thinking that he wouldn't mind seeing her naked in whatever circumstance she wanted to offer. Why are women so hard on themselves about things that don't really matter to anyone?

I wanted to say something to this effect to her, but one, the circumstances were totally wrong (her trying to impress friends, me panting and running) and two, people with distorted body images will never believe suggestions that don't fit their warped views. Learned that from a friend with an eating disorder.

I suppose that's a topic we might eventually address in the OurCollegeName women's group if that ever gets off the ground.